operators are standing by...

Looks as though Idol producers are giving already-taxed graphics people double duty tonight as the final three performers hit the big stage, pandering for votes.

Rather than wait until next Tuesday's finale, like they did last year, additional phone lines will be available this evening to accommodate the flood of votes producers expect as we narrow the field to the last two.

Each contestant will be given two separate numbers, presumably to put to rest the annual complaints of busy signals and unavailable circuits.

Now if the little guy in the graphics booth just remembers whose numbers are which.

sing that funky music...

Carrie, Bo and Vonzell are back in Los Angeles, preparing for Tuesday's final three performances.

If you're new to American Idol this year, the final three show is often called "free choice."  There will be no theme. 

Each of the contestants will sing three songs.  Normally the first is the song of the contestant's choice.  The second song is traditionally the judges' choice -- each judge selects one song for one contestant.  And the third song will be hand-picked by record executive Clive Davis, who will be part of the panel to offer his critique of each performance.  (If you don't know who Clive Davis is, find out here.)  Davis does not give the kids marshmallows.  He plays hardball, which can either sink them (Jasmine) or allow them to knock it out of the park (Diana).

It's always interesting to see what songs are pulled from the different hats.  But some of the suspense was (gratefully) ended Friday when the kids hit the friendly skies and landed in their even-friendlier hometowns.

Simon is choosing for Vonzell, and has selected the Donna Summer hit On The Radio.  Good selection for Vonzell, who has proven that she was born 30 years too late.  Disco suits her style perfectly, and she has, more than once, channeled the queen of disco. 

Randy gets to pick for Carrie.  And they must have pulled out the big checkbook to land the rights to a Shania Twain song, after years of adamant refusals.  Randy's choice?  Man! I Feel Like A Woman.  This will either really allow Carrie to prove that she can sell a song, because it's the perfect vehicle to perform, not just sing.  Or it won't.  But it will be interesting to watch.

Well, that leaves Paula, of course.  Paula has been known to pull some interesting song choices for the most interesting reasons.  Remember, she is the judge who told Clay she chose his song so he could prove once and for all that he was not merely a lounge-type singer.  And then she chose the ultimate lounge singer song, Mack the Knife.  Ah well.  She was in pain.  Or with Corey.  Whatever.

But it seems Paula has selected for Bo one of the ultimate rocker songs, The Rolling Stones' (Can't Get No) Satisfaction.

No word yet on Davis' choices or the kids' own picks, but if I find out, and can verify or personally feel confident in the information, I'll pass it along.

Seems the kids had grand times having days proclaimed for them.  (But, think about it, if there was one day proclaimed in your name, would you really want it to be a Friday the 13th?  If that's a curse, though, it's gonna curse all three of them, which could cause all of us to curse Tuesday.)

Carrie was dodging questions about her relationship with Anthony Fedorov after her tearfest on Wednesday, Vonzell was evading questions about her waterworks display on Tuesday, and Bo wiped his own tears after being cheered by over 300 city employees at City Hall, none of which, apparently, were members of the local police department.

Carrie sang the national anthem and signed autographs at the local high school.  Vonzell sang two of the songs she's performed on the show and got to take over DJ duties at the local radio station.  Bo sang Sweet Home Alabama with Lynyrd Skynyrd and then sang over the loudspeaker at the Wal-Mart.  Gee, when I'm at the Wal-Mart, the only thing I hear is a bunch of people in the ladies underwear section spelling out the word WAL-MART.  Bummer.

Remember Tuesday is the sale date of the CD.  But, if you don't want the entire CD, it will be available for individual song download.  Where?  You guessed it!  Walmart.com!  (And you thought they all just got in their FORDS, drinking their COKES and went to the Wal-Mart for the fun of it.)

It's all about the endorsements!

 

 

[soon to be] available at wal-mart...

Tuesday, May 17 is the release date for the season four compilation album.  I'm not certain if that's good news or bad news, but I'll be buying it, just like I've purchased all of the others.

Here's the song list, and, for the first time possibly, they're all recording songs they've performed during the competition.

Carrie is singing Indepenence Day.  (I would have preferred Alone.  But maybe they're thinking of that as a possible first single flip-side.  It would be a smart move.)

Bo is performing I Don't Want to Be.  (Again, I would have picked Whipping Post, but maybe they have better plans for that one.)

Vonzell is singing Best of my Love.

Anwar's choice is A House Is Not a Home.  (Ouch.  I hate that song.  What was wrong with What a Wonderful World?  Couldn't they get the release?)

Nadia's song is You Don't Have to Say You Love Me.  (No quarrel there.)

Nikko will be singing Part-Time Lover.  (Just knew we'd get at least one Stevie song.)

Constantine's selection is My Funny Valentine.  (Considering he sang this on every talk show after his elimination, that comes as no surprise.  And it's one of his best.)

Jessica will perform Total Eclipse of the Heart.  (Yay!  I miss you Jessica.)

Anthony's song is Everytime You Go Away.  (Yep.  He did that one well.)

Scott's track is Against All Odds.  (See Constantine, above.)

Lindsey will offer Knock On Wood.  (Did they have to include her?  I mean, she's not going on tour or anything...)

Mikalah is singing God Bless the Child.  (See Lindsey, above.)

And the twelve-tet will [again] assault us with When You Tell Me That You Love Me.

There it is.  It can be pre-ordered from Amazon.com. 

But, of course, you can always pick it up at Wal-Mart!  You may see Anwar there.

breaking news...

Attention shoppers.

Vonzell will be at the Wal-Mart.  Repeating, she WILL be at the Wal-Mart.

She is scheduled to be at the Colonial Boulevard Wal-Mart Superstore today from 1-2 p.m.

We return you to your regularly scheduled life.

idol in aisle three...

As Anthony Fedorov is having his shoes scanned and carrying his own luggage back to Philadelphia, the three remaining Idol contestants are relaxing in the comfort of their own private jets, zipping to the old homestead for a few hours of celebrity worship before zapping back to prepare for the last cut before the finale on May 24.

I know you're dying to know what's on their agenda.  So was I.  So I decided to find out.

Of course, they're all headed south, cause that's where all Idols and Idol runners-up come from, which should have been the neon clue yesterday that Anthony was a goner.

Bo will be headed home to Alabama, where he's scheduled to make Friday appearances in both his hometown of Helena and nearby Birmingham.  His first appearance will be on the, ahem, Rick & Bubba Show (this is not a joke), on Y-94.5 FM.  He's then scheduled to pop in at the local FOX morning show before heading to the Wal-Mart (seriously) to sign CDs.  Then they have him scheduled for a procession on his way to the park on Buck Creek, where he will have a meet and greet with his fans.

Carrie is going home to Checotah, Oklahoma, population 12, and is scheduled to have lunch with everybody before leading a parade through town to Pocket Park, where's she scheduled to sing the national anthem.

The Checotah Police Department (?) is ready for crowd control, we are being assured by its dispatcher, because "this is one of those things where we could be totally swamped."  Gee.  Ya think?

Post Pocket Park, she will be the center of attention in, presumably, the center of town, hosting a meet and greet at the People's National Bank hospitality room.  (This is not a joke.)  Then they're gonna rustle her up a limo and take her to the Wal-Mart.  No, really.

I want extra comments as a reward for my self-restraint.

Vonzell's hometown is a bit larger, and she's getting the key to it on what will be known as "Vonzell Solomon Day," in Ft. Myers, Florida.  [I've always wondered what that key unlocks.  Is it a master key?  Does it unlock everything in the city?  Or does it just unlock the bathrooms at Pocket Park?]

Oh, wait.  She's not headed to the Pocket, Vonzell will be arriving, by boat, no less, (this is Florida, after all) to Centennial Park.  No word, as yet, if she'll get to go to the Wal-Mart.  But if I find out, I will break into regularly scheduled blogging.

We can all watch as Vonzell visits home, by checking out www.news-press.com for live coverage. 

Oh, the perks of fame.

SIMULBLOG: i land in the stream...

Next week it's nine songs -- three from each of the remaining contestants.  So three will spend the next week memorizing, practicing, preening and traveling home to be the hometown star.

Which of these four are we spared from next week?

Ryan, looking exceptionally Republican, introduces the less than giddy kids and probably says the most obvious line in Idol history.  "They know who they like," he says, while pointing to the judges.  Well, no kidding, Dick Tracy.

Oh good.  We get to relive the country, soul, death and destruction from the evening before.  And yay!  It's time for the group sing.  Is four a group?  I mean, ten is a group.  Four is like a quartet.  And a quartet is not a group. 

Oh they're stringing out this country salute to Carrie, by forcing them to become little Kenny Rogerses and little Dolly Partons.  It's an Island in the Stream, filled with partner swapping, hand holding and the Bo stage, which, by the way, has become quite a lonely place recently.  Not a bad effort, though.

And it's the FORD spot!  My favorite part!  Squirrelly hair spot!  I'm nauseous.  But I liked the commercial.

With only a quartet (which is not a group) we obviously have a whole group of minutes to waste.  So, what better way to waste them than to do an Idol flashback to the kids' auditions.  Gee was that really five months ago?  Feels like five years.

The Vonz is first.  Oh!  I had forgotten the different colored shoes.  She sang Chain of Fools.  Very colorfully.  Next is Anthony, who sang a song about angels.  Oh, I remember LL Cool J!  He was a great judge, giving out hugs all around. 

We get to see Carrie, fresh from the farm, again.  And then, it's Bo's turn.  His is the one audition no one has ever seen.  And he sang Whipping Post, something we didn't know until tonight.  And they called him Harold.  That's right.  He's Harold. 

Ryan starts the big tease, showing the kids and everyone else, the VIP card which will carry three of them, in private jets, to their hometowns tomorrow so that their mayors can get all dressed up and the homefolk can give them banners, balloons and keys to the city.  Or to the town.  Or the farm.  Whatever.  Then, of course, he waves the single one-way lower class ticket to wherever is furthest from Hollywood.

Time for the execution.  Bo is sent to safety.  Grandmom is jumping out of her bloomers.  Carrie is sent to join him on the couch.  She shows more personality than she ever has on stage, as she jumps triumphantly into Harold's arms. 

That leaves Anthony and the Vonz.  Ryan lets Baby V twist in the wind, in his newly-favorite "I want the loser to think it's you before I kick him in the stomach" act, lets Vonz off the hook and sticks it squarely into Anthony's back.  Then sticks the plane ticket in his pocket.

We see the funeral footage, and we see Carrie checking the camera to cry on cue, the band totally messes up Anthony's swan song, but what does he care?  He ain't competing no more.

Nice run Anthony. 

Until next week.

Simulblog out!

you heard it here first...

Idol final fours have, except for the season of perfection, known as season two, provided a huge tremor in the contest, so much so that we still speak of them today.  Season one, of course, gave us the new verb:  to be Tamyra'd, when Tamyra Gray, who had turned in a spectacular season, was inexplicably dumped in favor of Nikki McKibbin.  Season two was a justified ouster as the singing Marine, Josh Gracin, was the only conceivable reject to leave the perfect trio of Klayben.  Then there was last year, when LaToya London fell victim to the tears of Hawaii.

I have a strong hunch tonight somebody's getting Tamyra'd.

All of the elements are in place, sort of like the atmospheric conditions surrounding my home that are threatening me with a thunderstorm.

First we have the Vonz.  Of those who watched last season, who can forget Jasmine's tears after one of Simon's most severe verbal beatings?  At this stage, the kids are tired, and it was clear that Jasmine had reached the end of her endurance.  But a pretty girl with tears streaming down her face?  Who doesn't want to kiss her and make it better? 

Vonzell's tears were genuine, I fully believe, despite the rumblings of pandering for sympathy.  Her performance was a wreck.  She knew that.  But something else is going on with Vonzell.  The rumors, that are inevitable when Idol keeps its trap shut, are ranging anywhere from homesickness to illness in the family, to death in the family, to death of her dog to her being forced to switch songs on a minute's notice.  But combine tears on a young pretty face, and especially one that has turned in excellence, performance after performance, with a second song that had the potential to wipe out memories of the original, and you've got new voters added to her fanbase, which should, after Simon's blatant pro-anyone-but-Vonz bashing after her second song, vote until their fingers bleed.

Most people are assuming they'll see Vonzell on the line tonight.  I don't think so. 

Then there's Anthony, the poster child for the VFTW this week.  (I refuse to provide a link to these idiots, so why in the hell AOL is promoting this website with a link is beyond me.  It's also insulting, but I digress.)

When the finals began, I expected Anthony to be one of the first of the guys to get the boot.  After all,he deserved it.  His performances in the semis were nothing extraordinary, and he was lucky that there were less vocally talented guys standing alongside.  But Anthony, of all of the contestants, has been the one transformed from geeky kid, known mostly for his childhood and his trach scar, to polished performer.  His performances last night were solid.  They were good.  He went lyric-for-lyric with Carrie and won hands down.  He has the tenacious support of the Bratz crowd, and he may have just picked up some of the idle Scott fans and still-bitter Constantine crowd.

Anthony's only problem, ironically, might be that of all four of them, he was the only one to turn in two good performances.  Disasters bring people out of their homes to help.  Good times keep them inside watching Oprah.  But he was last in the lineup.  No contestant in four seasons, who has gone last in the lineup, has ever been booted the following night.  (The only exception would be, of course, Clay Aiken, who performed the last song of the season two finale and did not win the title.)

That leaves Simon's chosen finalists:  Bo and Carrie.

Bo is safe.  No question.  He has given the American Idol stage a much-needed break from the blah of the pop and the meh of the country.  Many criticise Bo for playing it safe and predictably.  Perhaps.  But he knows his strong suit, and Bo's "safe" performances would be anyone else's challenge of a lifetime.

He's not going anywhere.  He's been on the seal, and his fans remember how it felt to see him there.

What has Carrie done?  While Anthony has risen beyond his expectations, Carrie has fallen from her perch.  Her version of Sin Wagon was not nearly as good as Amy's last year, and, while she did throw herself into the performance more than before, it did seem a little awkward for the word "sin" to come out of Barbie's mouth.  Her second selection?  Wretched. 

Two straight weeks of unmemorable performances might send the less-emotionally-invested to reward Anthony, to give a high-five to Bo or to wipe Vonzell's tears.  Her primary fan base, which has kept her safe thus far, may just have become a little too self-confident that their girl is in no danger. 

I see a Tamyra coming on.

Based on last night's performances alone:
Should be bottom two:   Vonzell and Carrie.

Based on last night, all season, and past seasons:
Will be bottom two:  Anthony and Carrie.

Did anyone else find it ironic that Jasmine Trias was in the audience last night, seated very closely to LaToya London?  I found it both ironic and prophetic.  And I'm either gonna be ingenious or an idiot.

Carrie is going home.